Playing House: Settling In

[notthatcrazy]

After the first few days of freedom, life settles down into some kind of rhythm. They've been in touch with the team (mostly variations on 'We're okay, hope you are too.') and Face has been out looking for ways to supplement their cash supply, which has left Murdock at something of a loose end.

He hasn't been sleeping well the past couple of nights, and tonight looks to be no different. It's not long after he drifts off that the nightmares start. They come in a confusing mish-mash of jumbled images, but the overarching theme is always the same.

Boss, it's Face... he's hurt bad...

Don't leave me, baby... I need you...

He wakes with a start, his arm thrown across his partner's chest, and grabs hold of him tightly, taking deep, frantic breaths.

Comments

[notjustaface]

"You kidding?" Both eyebrows arch together, "If something happens the only place I wanna be is with you."

He means it when he says he wants to protect Murdock, even from himself.

[notthatcrazy]

He sits up, wrapping his arms around his knees.

"I don't want to hurt anyone."

[notjustaface]

Murdock pulling away is about the last thing he expects, but he plays it cool - letting him have his space.

"Me neither, and I don't want you to get hurt. If that means taking a couple punches that's fine."

[notthatcrazy]

"It's not fair that you have to deal with that."

This should be a happy, relaxed time in their lives. This isn't fair to either of them.

[notjustaface]

"And it's fair that you have to deal with my baggage?" He forces himself to sit up, sheets pooling around his waist, and reaches to settle his hand at the center of Murdock's back.

"Life's not fair."

[notthatcrazy]

He doesn't flinch away from the touch, which is a good sign.

"I'm just tired of worryin' about it, y'know? Even on the good days it's there in the back of my head... What if the meds stop working, what about the side effects, what if somethin' happens and you can't get me more when I need 'em..."

He shakes his head.

"It's just always there."

[notjustaface]

Rubbing to his side, Face lets himself gently squeeze him before scooting closer and wrapping both arms around him protectively.

"We'll deal with that stuff when we have to..." he whispers, kissing his ear. "Right now, we just gotta deal with what's already on our plate. Keeping ourselves fed and clothed and happy. Right?"

[notthatcrazy]

"Yeah, I guess so."

He leans into him, accepting the loving comfort.


"It just sucks bein' afraid of yourself."

[notjustaface]

"Hey... we all got something..." he murmurs softly, squeezing him even tighter.

"I'm afraid of myself too... hell, you've seen what happens when I don't have my head on straight."

[notthatcrazy]

It really is strange sometimes, how their broken pieces fit together.

"Can you do me a favor and talk to me til I fall asleep again?"

[notjustaface]

Like a pair of jigsaw puzzles that somehow fit together to make a bigger picture.

"Sure," he leans back toward the bed, taking Murdock with him. "What do yay wanna hear about?"

[notthatcrazy]

"Anything you want. Just wanna hear your voice."

He settles back into his arms, somewhat calmer.

[notjustaface]

Face groans, always at a loss as to what to say when he didn't have a topic at hand.

"So, uh... Guess I start that bartender job later on tonight. Actually earning money legitimately... So that's new."

[notthatcrazy]

"Proud of you, man."

And only a tiny bit worried about the things he could get up to tending bar...

[notjustaface]

"What, for faking my way through a forged resume and making it through an interview that consisted of pouring a half-dozen drinks and taking my shirt off?"

He brushes a kiss across Murdock's cheek, "I've run deeper cons in my sleep."

[notthatcrazy]

"Yes, exactly," he replies, a slightly stubborn look on his face.

"Just don't flirt with the pretty ones too much, 'kay?"

He wraps his arms around his waist, kissing his temple to let him know he's (mostly) teasing.

[notjustaface]

"You know I've only got eyes for you." Face murmurs into his ear, kissing it gently.

"I might flirt but at the end of my shift you're the only one I wanna be with."

[notthatcrazy]

"That's what I wanted to hear," he smiles.

"Long as you come home to me, I don't mind."

(Not much, at least.)

[notjustaface]

Curling his body close, Face begins to stroke slow circles over his partner's bare belly - attempting to lull him back to sleep.

"You've got something no gorgeous girl can have."

[notthatcrazy]

He does like a good belly rub.

"Yeah I do."

[notjustaface]

"I didn't mean a penis..." He raises a wry eyebrow, "That's not exactly a deal breaker."

[notthatcrazy]

"I didn't say that," he replies with a quiet laugh. "You're the one bringin' it down to that level."

[notjustaface]

He can't help but grin into Murdock's curls, shaking his head.

"I just wanted to make sure you knew it was my heart."

[notthatcrazy]

"You coulda just said that to begin with."

He rests a hand on his chest.

"But yeah... I know."

[notjustaface]

It's kind of a big thing for him, bigger than wedding rings - bigger even than living together. Of course, the biggest moments always come when you least expect them or know how to address them.

"I'm glad," he smiles reflexively, pulling back just enough to see his face. "I mean it, though. You're stuck with me..."